What is your attitude today? Have you got something difficult coming up, or is life a bed of roses?
I know so many people who are going through a difficult time at the moment. It feels almost like something is in their air. And for these people, it isn’t just one thing. There are issues in a number of areas of their life that seem hopeless.
And then I reflect on the little things that are bothering me. They pale into insignificance compared with the struggles of others. I am grateful that life is good at this point in time.
I have been awed by the way some of these people have been getting through. “You’ve just got to get in with it,” they have told me. This is true, and feeling sorry for yourself doesn’t always get you anywhere. However, it can be all too easy to wallow and think, “Why me?” And acknowledging that things are tough isn’t a bad thing. We need time to come to terms with bad news, and pretending it isn’t happening can cause problems for us in the long run. It is all about balance.
I am sure we all have situations that we don’t look forward to. My teacher-friends will struggle to say the word “Ofsted” with a smile, and no-one likes having their accounts audited. Others truly dread going to the dentist.
Dreading an outcome
My children went back to school after the Easter holidays this week. One thing that can make or break school for my son is who he will end up sitting next to. It changes every half term in their class. They all have “learning partners”, and work closely with this person. We have tried in the past to calm his anxiety by asking who the worst person would be, and indicating that statistically it is unlikely he will get them. Unfortunately, he got the boy who thumps followed by the girl that pinches… Statistics went out of the window!
So on Sunday night we again went through the possibilities, and gave him some strategies if he did end up with one of the bossy girls. He took a pebble that we said he could rub and think about us, rather than the situation, if things were bad. I am relieved to report he came out of school with a great big smile this time, but still took the pebble again today as “you don’t know when things can get tricky”.
When things get tricky
If we always go into a situation with the attitude that it is going to be bad, it probably will be. We will be unlikely to try our best if our mindset says something will fail. I’ve blogged before about how I need to keep up a shield for when I liaise with certain colleagues. Being prepared for a challenging reaction is one thing. Presenting an idea with the attitude that it won’t get through is self-defeating.
So, the next time you find yourself dreading something that is coming up, think again. What could I do to make the situation more palatable? What strategies can I take in my tool bag to use if things don’t go my way?
Let me know how you are getting on! What situations do you dread?
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